Divorce is the formal termination of a civil or religious marriage that previously bound two or more people in polygamy. This phenomenon is a dilemma that some parents face today even though it will completely change their lives. Divorce brings loneliness, depression, darkness and even suicide in a person’s life.
In Malian law, it is distinguished from de facto separation, without legal consequences, and legal separation, which is legally recognized but keeps the marriage intact. According to statistics, more than 140,000 divorces were recorded in Mali in 2020. In Bamako District, the divorce rate is estimated at over 10,000 per year. According to the same study, for the Kayes region, the only cases collected at the trial level between 2000 and 2011 were 1008 cases of divorce.
Maïmouna Keita explains her divorce story to us. ” My husband was a cheater. He covered his face before I became his wife. After marriage he suddenly changed his behavior like me, had no respect for my person, disobeyed my principles and traditional values. After a lot of sensitivity, vigilance and seeing no change, so I got divorced, but frankly I regret it today. Because I never saw my children again. I quickly realized that I had made a bad choice to divorce myself leaving my children in the hands of another woman who would not be able to take care of them.He is sorry.
After 10 years of marriage, Moussa Koïté opted for divorce. “We have to recognize that divorce is not a woman’s desire, even less so than a man’s. But in certain situations, divorce is better than continuing a relationship that has no future. After the divorce, things went wrong, the children were the first victims. At first I struggled to overcome the difficulties, but as the children grew up, I was able to face reality in their faces..
The Muslim religion always asks for a compromise to be found between the man and the woman before recording the divorce. According to Imam Sheikh Sherif Haidara of Siracoro Meguetan, “The word divorce does not exist in the religiously holy Quran. There is question of marriage, but never divorce because we come together for life for better and for worse only death can separate you. God is very true Lying is forbidden, but if lying is the best solution to save the marriage then feel free to do so. There is a language that says: Being married doesn’t mean you are a man, but being able to tolerate your wife’s desires and keep her despite her bad faults, that makes you a man..
The court will be the last resort
According to sociologist Moussa Coulibaly, “The number of divorces in Mali is increasing year by year. The reasons are many, including the emotional unpreparedness of newlyweds who cannot get rid of old habits. Even at home, many young couples feel the need to break free from the confines of home. Marriage gradually becomes liberal because one or the other spouse cannot spare some time for the other, but also for the needs of housework. We notice more and more that the harmony between the couple deteriorates in the first months after the celebration. If some lack communication, for most the woman’s disobedience destroys the couple’s atmosphere. Among the various storms that the couple goes through, there is impatience for one or the other. Divorce has a very sensitive effect on the psychological balance of children. Accustomed to living with both parents, they may suddenly find themselves without one or the other. This situation can lead to mood disorders, not to mention that over time they often become a pain in the ass for the parent who has custody of the child. The child may experience difficulty concentrating because he is cut off from his natural environment. To avoid this triviality of divorce, young people must be prepared for the fact that marriage presents ups and downs that must be overcome. Physical attractiveness criteria should not be the only factor that determines choice. Families must resort to the courts as a last resort. »
In other words, divorce is not a good thing even if you fight all the time but it is best to sit down and solve the problem together because you have sworn to each other before the law and even before God. Love till your last breath. So to break this union and for the best of the children would be a lack of respect for God and the law.
Maymuna Fakaba Sissoko
formula: Mali Grandstand